Sunday, March 30, 2014

student teaching

Guess who finally has time to blog again? THIS GIRL!! 

I am officially done with student teaching!
Timpanogos Elementary
4th grade
55 days
DONE!

The first few days of student teaching my voice was gone. Thank goodness I was only observing and teaching once and a while the first few days. 
After the first week, I started gradually taking on more subjects and then eventually the whole class.

When my student teaching first began, I did NOT like it one bit. I was stressed, overwhelmed, and had zero free time. With student teaching, working 15 hours at my other job, and being a perfectionist, I never did anything else. I never had "me" time to do the things I love and that was hard. I seriously started to doubt my career choice. I couldn't help but think, "Five years of very expensive college for this!? What was I thinking?!" And it also made me mad that non-teachers had no idea how stressful teaching is. (It still makes me mad!)

The worst part about my student teaching was that about two weeks into it, I started experiencing very high levels of morning anxiety. The minute I woke up, my heart would start to race. I couldn't eat anything or even interact with my husband. It took all my strength to get myself dressed and out the door. Some mornings were so bad that I threw up over and over again. This lasted a little over a month. Luckily, after I started getting into the swing of things, it got a lot better.

Overall, I had an incredible student teaching experience. I had the best mentor I could ask for. Some student teachers' mentors gave them cutesy presents on their last day. Mine didn't give me anything tangible. Instead, he gave me the best gift any mentor could give me and that's passion. I left my student teaching experience with a whole new perspective on teaching. For the first time in a while, I am very excited to teach! My mentor pushed me to the point that it was frustrating sometimes. In hindsight I'm so grateful he did because I am more prepared to succeed in a competitive society. I am more prepared to take on challenging students and make a difference. I feel confident in my ability to teach and I owe most of that to my mentor.

I miss the kids. Up until the last week of student teaching, I did not think I would. Almost every single day of my student teaching was spent surviving.  It didn't feel like I was gaining any kind of connection with my students. When I finally reached my last day, and I had to say goodbye to those faces, yeah, there most definitely was a connection. I learned that it's not about being the most fun or the coolest teacher. It's about working your tail off to help them succeed. Luckily, most of my students knew how hard I worked and they appreciated it. And the ones who didn't appreciate it... they needed my hard work the most. I'm finally comprehending what teaching is all about.

I decided to make a paper chain when I had 38 days left.



February 10th.
I had 30 more days.
It was the first day I came home feeling pumped about teaching.

These are just some of the goodies I brought home for Valentine's Day. 

One of my students brought me this on Valentine's Day.
So far I haven't landed a job. It's funny how I thought the end of student teaching would feel so carefree.But now I wake up every morning worrying about what I'm going to be doing for the next year. Uncertainty can be a pain in the butt sometimes. 
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