miss lillian renee // 3 months

Dear Lily,

You are growing up SO fast. One day you can barely lift your head, and the next, you can roll over! I've heard a lot of moms say that they want their baby to stop growing-that they are growing too fast. Me? Um... You can keep growing fast. Keep growing fast until you can put yourself to sleep. haha. No... please stop growing because if you stop growing then time will stand still and I won't have to go back to work. Deal?

You are a very spirited baby which can be... well... heartwarming and frustrating. Your spirited nature makes watching you and interacting with you SO much fun. I love watching you explore your extremities and master the ability to control your body. You can hold your head up like a pro and rolling over from back to tummy is second nature. You love being held in the standing position which always elicits an inquisitive and delighted expression on your face. Airplane and Row Your Boat (when I pedal your legs and sing Row, Row, Row your Boat) are your two favorite games with your mama and laughing back and forth is your favorite thing to do with dad. Speaking of laughing, you have the cutest laugh! But I'll get to that in a minute.

Your spirited nature also makes you hard to put down. By "put down" I mean in a swing, on the ground, in the bouncer, in your carseat, and to sleep...especially to sleep! Writing this post took all day because I couldn't put you down for more than 20 minutes. (Aren't babies supposed to nap for longer than that!?) Being held and played with is your favorite thing. You are very social and don't want to miss out on the fun. 

You love the outdoors. Taking you outside instantly calms you down and you especially love outings that don't involve too much carseat time and if it means being held. (Keep in mind that this is only true though if you haven't missed a nap.) 

The other day, I took you out in the rain so that the cold rain drops were falling on us and you stopped crying. That's not a typo. You stopped crying in the rain. Of course it was just a light drizzle, but I couldn't help but think you are definitely your momma's daughter. So curious and so interested in new experiences and sensations. Oh, and the 4th of July? While many of the little kids went inside because they were afraid of the fireworks, you did just fine. As long as you were being held, the fireworks didn't startle you or frighten you. 

You love bath time! As soon as you hit the water, you kick and move that tiny, naked body of yours. I love catching you staring at the loofahs that are hanging below the shower-head.  Bath time is one of the few times during the day when you don't need to be held and you are happy for more than 10 minutes. Sometimes I eat dinner while you kick and splash, but mostly I read Harry Potter. Sometimes I read it out loud to you which is adorable because you usually start babbling away back at me. I'm pretty sure you're saying something like, "Oh that Hermione and Ron, why don't they just hook up already?"

Just in a month, you have accomplished so many things. You are hitting your milestones early which just further confirms my theory that there is a big kid trapped in your tiny, adorable, squeezable body. You can grasp your hands together. I catch you flirting with your hands and feet all the time. You can roll over from back to stomach and sometimes from stomach to back. You can laugh out loud. You can kick like no one's business and you are really good at grabbing mom's hair. You are starting to inch and grunt your way forward during tummy time. (Please don't crawl too soon, I'm not ready!) You are very talkative! Probably the cutest sound you make is the "ahh-goo" sound. That one gets me every time! You aren't very interested in toys yet and I haven't seen you grab for them. I could probably work on dangling more things in front of you, but there will be plenty of time for that in the future. There is no rush. You can sit up in the bumbo chair for forever. Well, that is if you didn't get sick of it and start crying. 

Your laugh is the best sound in the whole word. Really. If I could only hear one sound the rest of my life, it would be your laugh. When you laugh, I laugh and I will keep doing whatever it is that is making you laugh for forever if it means you will keep laughing. I'm just a wee bit jealous that your dad is really good at getting you to laugh over and over again. But mostly I just love it because it is the cutest thing ever to see you two interacting. You're totally going to be a daddy's girl. 

If there is one thing that is cuter than your laugh, it is when you babble. You talk to the loofahs in the bath tub, to the banner hanging above your changing table, to the plush leafs hanging above your crib, but especially to your mama. I love having conversations with you. We mostly just say, "hi" back and forth but I could do it all day and maybe all night. Which is saying something because I do not like going without sleep. 

Which brings me to last night...

Last night was... well... rough.Your dad had to be at work at 6 a.m. today which meant he needed to get up at 5. Well, of course, you don't fall asleep these days until 11 or midnight.  It was 10 p.m. when he was trying to fall asleep and I was trying to get you to fall asleep. You were tossing and turning and fussing and grunting. So I dragged the pack n' play into the living room and grabbed a fan from storage and placed it in the hallway, near your crib. After an hour of patting your back, walking you, patting your back some more, you finally fell asleep in your crib. Well around 3:30 a.m. your dad got up to use the restroom and BAM! knocked over the fan that I had left in the hall. You immediately started crying. I was so mad at myself for leaving it in the hall. The next 2 hours were spent trying to calm you down and get you back to sleep. I'm just glad every night isn't like that.

Breastfeeding is going well. We are finally getting the hang of it. I still use a nipple shield because whenever I try going without it, you immediately get confused or frustrated and since I'm not very patient, I just go back to the shield. But I am not ashamed because you are still getting breastmilk and it works for us! Breastfeeding used to be a calm & quiet bonding moment but lately there's been more grunting and scratching. Let's just say we've been holding hands a lot more and I'm totally okay with that. It's still a bonding moment. I love it when I catch you looking at me. 

Although getting you to fall asleep is the biggest pain in the you-know-where, once you're asleep, you usually sleep 6 solid hours in a row at night. Sometimes even 8. If you do wake up in the middle of the night hungry, all I have to do is feed you for 15-30 minutes and then I can miraculously set you back in your crib and you keep on sleeping. 

You love your hands! You will often put them together and suck the daylights out of them. I'm not sure if you're teething or if you just like sucking, but man alive you love it. You've also been drooling a lot lately which is so funny! I wipe your chin more than I say, "It's just a nap, Lily."

You like:
-bumbo chair
-being naked
-baths
-being outside
-daddy's arms
-ceiling fans
-t.v. screen
-eating
-standing
-when you have mom and dad's full attention
-gnawing on mom's knuckle
-music
-your hands and feet
-being tickled
-kisses from mom and dad
-strangers (you flirt shamelessly with them & trick them into thinking you are the perfect baby!) :)
-visitors

You dislike:
-missing your nap
-being left alone for more than 10 min.
-being in the carseat
-going down for a nap
-going down for bedtime
-your binky (Darn. I was kind of hoping we could use that to soothe you for at least 6 months. Now what will I use in church?)

Your favorite song: Requiem for a Dream by Jennifer Thomas

Nicknames we call you: cutie, turtle, hunny bunny, stinker, tiny

Happy 3 months miss Lillian Renee. You have my heart. You are my everything. I love you.